im·pulse

Hi! It's been veeeeeeeeeeeeerrrryyyyy loong since my last post (I just published my long lost forgotten draft on April graduation, but I guess that doesn't count as recent post so............) I'm blabbering here because of the sudden urge to spill some words on what has been happening recently.

And by recently, I mean today. This evening.

Not much really. I had my hair cut today. SRSLY MAN I GOTTA DO SOMETHING WITH MY IMPULSIVE ACTIONS....................

Earlier today I decided on a stupid decision that eventually leads me to this impulse to cut my hair. A VER__RRR_RRYYY stupid decision, mind you, that I regret so much. The main reason behind that stupid decision being -- "I need some justification on this thing I'm dying to do, but now that I ended up not getting the justification i want, I still haven't do it anyway" -- oh well.

So basically after I hear the not-the-justification-i-expected, I looked on my reflection on the Commutter Line's window (yeah you read just fine), and decided that my hair is a mess and I need to get it done; the results of 8-months-old green hair dye plusssss the shitty haircut I got last month (seriously this is the first time I have ever hate on a hairdresser ugh it was so bad.........................................I requested a shaggy cut --- the end result WAS a shaggy cut actually but the layer was a mess sdafgsdadgsad it looks like my hair really parted in two level of upper and lower, if you get what I'm talking about....................)

And so, right after I get home, I took a shower, get dressed, then dashed out again only to find out that my regular salon has already closed.........(it was 18.45 already) BUT THEN my impulse still hasn't give up, and I drove to other hair shop I haven't try and don't know whether the hairdresser is good or not -- gotta go find out --, which, luckily enough, still accept guests until 19.00 h Eh E h, and so.................here I am, sitting in front of the notebook, with my new haircut, blabbering about this impulsive habit I have; GoD my impulsive habit......

I don't know since when does this habit started. But if I have to guess, then I'll pick the time span when I was still living in Bandung as an anak rantau di kosan sendirian kalau lagi bosen berangkat sendirian kemanapun dan ngapainpun cabut letsgo.

Once, I bought a black ugly boots at Ace Hardware; only because of  the label said "SALE, LIMITED ITEMS" and my then stupid thought "oiya kan mau karsam jadi butuh sepatu boot ya beli ah" LOL NO GURL WERE YOU WRONG, that is not the right kind of boots I needed,, it was a RIDING BOOTS FOR BIKE RIDER YKNOW SDSDHGFHSA shoulda wait out or ask my friends and bought the mainstream green one...................

Several times, I was just scrolling down my phone on a lazy weekend. Then I feel the urge to go to movies and watch something -- anything, really -- and yeah, thank you impulse!!!I jumped out of bed, get ready only in about 5 minutes, then went to the movies. Alone. You might think this is pathetic but to be honest it is fun. Watching movies alone is fine, and you need to try it once in a while. Well, gotta warn you of the awkward moment when the movie ends, the lights start turning up, and you're the only one sitting alone; every other person being in a couple or a  group, tho.

There are already many other times that I act based on impulse.......................mostly the impulse to shop or buy something............you know how it is with girls right????????????????

.........and so my latest impulse-purchase being a Lululemon yoga mat and a magazine; which, right after I made the purchase, realized I don't really need them..............................not urgently anyway.

There's a good side of being impulsive tho!!!!!!!!! Gue menjadi manusia yang berjiwa 'YUK' kalo diajak keluyuran HE kalo lagi ga capek dan ingin menyendiri tentunya he he he.


And so for those who have this symptom of extreme impulsiveness........if you want to go somewhere by impulse and might want to have a companion, you can ask me, maybe my impulse is switched on and I might say YUK rightaway.


p.s. sorry for the unstructured writing!!!!!!!! Gotta write more to improve my writing and english.............but we'll see~~~~~~

-

It's finally time to move on. To really move on.

Mulai melangkah keluar dari zona nyaman bernama "Bandung" dan "Teknik Geologi 2012".

Sepulang dari wisuda April 2017 kemarin, baru kerasa bener-bener ditampar sama kenyataan kalau waktunya udah hampir habis. Wisuda April kemarin marks more 34 of us to officially get our degree and - one by one - will soon be leaving on our own, to have another journey that awaits us, soon after this chapter ended.

Dari wisuda Oktober kemarin sebenarnya harusnya udah move on sih. Tapi entah kenapa, sepertinya tanpa sadar otak gue settingannya masih "Bandung masih menjadi rumah. Semua temen-temen gue masih disana, gue bisa kesana kapanpun buat ketemu mereka, just to have another good day full of silly-no-nonsense jokes".

Tanpa sadar wisuda April gue jadiin momen berharga yang gue tunggu-tunggu; karena itu adalah waktu dimana gue bisa ketemu sama banyak muka-muka familiar; ketemu sama zona ternyaman; ketemu sama teman-teman seperjuangan selama jaman kuliah.

Terus ketika momen yang gue nantikan itu berakhir; dan gue menjejakkan kaki lagi di Jakarta, the fact that it's all coming to an end really, really, slaps me in the face.

Merasa "kehilangan alasan" buat ke Bandung lagi, karena orang-orang yang menjadi alasan gue kesana mungkin udah ga disana lagi....

Bener-bener sedih karena gak tau kapan bisa ketemu lagi, bahkan gak tau whether our path will cross again or not. Semuanya bener-bener udah jalan di jalannya masing-masing.

To be frank, wisuda April kemarin buat gue rasanya jadi kayak semacam "liburan". Berasa banget pas gue sampe di rumah lagi. Walaupun gue baru sampe Bandung jam 10 malem hari jumat dan pulang lagi ke Jakarta besok malamnya, tetep aja rasanya.......kayak refreshing gitu. Ketemu temen-temen gue jadi semacam hiburan yang amat sangat menyenangkan; buat sebentar, gue lupa sama jenuhnya dan bosannya di Jakarta sehari-hari sekarang ini. Ketemu kalian bener-bener hiburan spesial; gue baru sadar ini pas udah sampe di rumah, dan "yah.......selesai nih.....?"

Ya memang agak aneh kenapa gue baru ngerasa "segininya" tuh sekarang. Kenapa gak habis gue wisuda? Ya mungkin karena tadi itu. Karena bulan November kemarin, ketika gue cabut dari Bandung, otak gue masih ngeles dengan "ah masih ada Wisuda April" dimana teman-teman terdekat gue akan di wisuda.

Karena sepertinya, ternyata bulan November kemarin gue belum sepenuhnya menerima fakta bahwa gue akan segera kehilangan zona ternyaman gue.

And now that I'm really in the middle of losing it.....................huf.

Memang sih masih ada wisuda Juli. Masih ada teman-teman yang akan gue samperin bulan Juli nanti. Tapi walaupun gue kesana, apa semua muka familiar itu bakalan kesana?

Mungkin semuanya udah sibuk sama urusannya masing-masing; atau jadwal roster yang gak pas; atau hal lainnya. Walaupun bukan gue yang di wisuda, bagaimanapun, akan sangat menyenangkan buat ketemu kalian semua lagi.

Setelah wisuda Juli..........?

Ah sedih............

Wkwk yah tapi gimanapun juga doaku adalah angkatan kita habis di wisuda Juli besok ya!! Semoga yang masih berjuang dilancarkan jalannya, sampai ketemu wisuda Juli! (Semoga gue sudah benar-benar siap keluar zona ternyaman ini)